Tomorrow is a Latter Day

It’s happened again. The gods of misfortune looked unfavorably upon me yesterday. I’m not surprised; things were going relatively well.

Then all hell broke loose.

It started Friday night when I lost my keys – car, house, mailbox, etc. sometime during a lovely dinner at Dolce Vita and crepes at Sweet Paris with my friend, Karen. (The s’mores crepes are to DIE for!) I have an extra house key, but not an extra car key. (I’m driving my mom’s old Toyota and only have one key.) So I got up Saturday morning and called the restaurants, but no one had turned in keys. I found a locksmith who came to my house and made a new key, but by the time he was done, I was late for my appointment with Robyn Arouty to get Coco’s picture taken.

Robyn is an amazing photographer who specializes in pet photography. Once a month, she does something called Pocketshots. You sign up for a 30-minute session, and she donates a portion of the pet portrait fee to a local dog rescue organization. I was afraid we would miss our time slot, but Robyn was running late and was finishing up with another dog when I got there. Coco was a PILL during the photo shoot. She would not sit or stay – she just couldn’t settle down. Robyn put her in a blue chair and put some red glasses on her. She looked adorable. I tried to get her to stay in the chair and keep the glasses on, but she wasn’t having it. She may get the Little Shit of the Day award, which Robyn gives to the pet that puts up the biggest fight! :(

On my way home, one of my tires blew out. (Had a flat last week and used the spare, which is a full-sized tire so I hadn’t replaced it yet. The blowout was a different tire.) So I exited the freeway, pulled into a parking lot and called a tow truck guy who towed me to a Firestone near downtown. (Coco got to ride in the cab of a truck – yea! The 52-year-old, married truck driver hit on me – ick!) I decided to replace all the tires because I wasn’t taking ANY chances on the other two. (The tires were four years old. I asked the salesman if he thought I should replace the front two tires as well as the back two. He said it was up to me and asked if I drive over lots of bumps and potholes. I said, um, yeah. I live in Houston.)

I watched the second half of the Aggie/’Bama game on TV, which was very exciting and made the time pass quickly. (Firestone didn’t mind at all that Coco came in the shop.) My car was ready at 6:45, and I went home, showered, dressed and drove ever-so-within-the-speed-limit to the Hobby Center to see The Book of Mormon, which I was supposed to see with my friend, Omi, who’d had to cancel earlier because her son was sick. (Poor baby – hope he’s better!) The show was HILARIOUS! The sets and choreography were ingenious, the songs were clever, and the leads were brilliant, especially the actor who played Elder Cunningham. It really is an ensemble show, and the only way I knew I wasn’t on Broadway is that I got in my car (new tires!) and drove home. I thought about Mom. I think she would have liked it. (We saw Avenue Q on Broadway, and she loved it and wasn’t offended at all. Susan and I did a really good job of raising her!)

So I drove home, and as I was driving down my street, I saw a utility truck with flashing lights in the middle of the street in front of my condo complex, and I thought to myself, hmmm, this can’t be good. Sure enough, my section of the complex was completely dark. I kid you not! I parked my car behind my garage door, went in the front door (thank Heavenly Father I had my house key – I hadn’t attached it to my new car key yet,) got Coco and took her out. Then I played a rousing round of Candy Crush Saga on my iPad and went to bed.

The power came on during the night. I woke up to all the lights on and the ceiling fan spinning – and a wet spot where Coco had peed on the bed.

Here she is, the winner of the Lil’ Shit of the Day Award!image

In Which the Gods of Misfortune Look Unfavorably Upon Me

I suck at being a grown-up.

I put off paying bills until I get overdue notices. I forget to give the dog her medicine. I kill every plant that enters my home. Thank God I’m not responsible for keeping a minor child alive till her 18th birthday. The pressure to feed, clothe, and shelter her adequately would probably do me in.

I returned home yesterday after babysitting someone else’s children and dogs (what were they thinking???) for five days. I knew my toilet was clogged; I went home on Friday while the kids were at school to do some bill-paying and plant-watering (we all know how that turned out) and the toilet stopped up. I made a mental note to get a plunger the next time I was at Walgreen’s. Like most mental notes, it gently fluttered through my brain like a snowflake and melted upon landing.

For a millisecond, I thought clogged toilet – plunger = disaster, but I flushed  anyway. As luck would have it, the toilet flapper (yes, I had to google it to find out the stopper thingy’s real name) failed, commencing the Great Toilet Overflow of ’13. Apparently, my condo tilts ever so slightly toward the master bedroom, so all the water from the toilet helpfully slid away from the tile floor in the bathroom and under my bedroom carpet, which I just had cleaned two weeks ago.

So this happened.


I’m probably the only person in the world happy to run this monstrous suction vac because the noise masks the tinnitus in my right ear.

And also this.


The funny thing is I hate that cheap-ass lamp and can’t wait to replace it. So glad it’s protected from the elements.

Shoot. Me. Now.

When faced with a particularly illuminating example of my fatuity, I immediately take a mental inventory of all the other boneheaded things I’ve done. I should say to myself, “Kelly, in general, you are a competent person. This is just a blip on your record, forgotten in the time it takes to deposit that babysitting money and write a check to the carpet cleaners. No children or animals were harmed in the creation of this mess, so you’re good.”

Instead, I think of all the ways I’ve narrowly escaped the consequences of foolish decisions:

Like the time I backed out of a really tight parking space in Seattle, knocking off a mirror and scraping the passenger side of the rental car I was driving. (In my defense, the parking spaces in this garage are freakishly close together, with the choice of three spaces crammed between two concrete columns repeating throughout both levels of the garage. It’s impossible to turn wide enough to pull into a space and impossible to back out of one unscathed.)

And the time I took Coco up to school with me on a Saturday, and she escaped from my classroom and ran around the school/church during a wedding (which is probably why they have a no-pets-in-the-building rule.) I was terrified she would run into the busy street adjacent to the church, but I found her in a classroom in the middle school.

And the time I got pulled over because my left brake light was out (which I thought I had already fixed) and got tickets for expired tags and not having my driver’s license or proof of insurance with me.

Fortunately, insurance paid for the damage on the rental car, Coco continues to be alive, and the tickets were dismissed when I showed the nice judge my current registration, driver’s license, and insurance.

Last night, Coco and I spent the night at my mom’s house, and I had a little pity party. I was going to be all, “I don’t need Baskin Robbins to cope with misfortune,” but then I thought if ever there was a time to self-medicate with ice cream, this was it!

So this happened.


Bundle of Love

In my defense, they have a new flavor called Bundle of Love. Who could pass up smooth and creamy chocolate ice cream filled with chocolate cups and gooey raspberry filled chocolate hearts during a time of crisis??

Update: Good news! I don’t have to replace my carpet! It’s sanitized and drying really well, so after (another) thorough cleaning, it will be good as new! Must be the Gods of Fortune throwing me a bone. :)

The Funny Papers

I miss the funny papers. Sundays, spreading the newspaper out on the kitchen table, trading sections with my family – Dear Abby, Parade Magazine, the editorial page. Do families today sit around the kitchen table with their iPads and Kindles and read the funny screens?

Summer 2012 Preview

Look what’s on its way to my house!!! The colors are YUM-my! I’ll post more pictures of the summer collection and how to wear it later. (If you can’t wait, click the link above and visit my website.)

Couldn’t resist adding a few more!

Arm candy


Sea of love

Worth Mentioning: My Happy Blogs


{MadeByGirl’s Etsy Shop}

This little poster sums it up quite nicely. I really enjoy reading blogs, and if I can do my blog-reading with a Grande, Two Sweet ‘n Low Latte from Starbucks, even better!

Although I have a few friends in real life who blog, most of the blogs I read are written by complete strangers. I like getting a glimpse into the lives of people I never would have “met” if not for this newfound obsession. I have many of my favorite design/lifestyle bloggers in my blogroll, but there are a few blogs I’ve come across lately that I want to highlight. Some are in the house/design category, some in the humor category, and some are just unique expressions of people’s creativity. People are just so clever, and I’m amazed by the many ways in which these writers channel their passions and their gifts into something that makes me smile each day.

This new mom imagines what her daughter is dreaming about during naptime and creates photoshoots that capture whimsical little moments:

{Mila’s Daydreams}

Neil really turned lemons into lemonade with this blog about appreciating the awesome (thanks, Sarah P. H., for pointing me in the direction of this one):

{1000 Awesome Things}

Then there’s the perennially funny Cake Wrecks. Jen and her husband John not only track down the best wrecks in the business but also add snort-worthy captions to boot:

{Cake Wrecks}

I wish I were as clever as Molly, who writes this newish blog about the exciting lives of the people who live in our catalogs:

{Catalog Living}

Julia has a wonderful website dedicated to all manner of houses, but my favorite category on her blog is the one about bad MLS photos:

{Hooked on Houses} 

Do you have any sure-fire pick-me-up blogs?

Happy reading! 

{Linking to Melissa’s Inspired By party}